G


[Verse]
      G
I was wallowing in squalor when a note came through the mail
       C                                                   G
From a light-fingered acquaintance who'd been lingering in jail
       C                                                    G
He had served a year of sentence when the fools had set him free
         D                                           G
And he'd had a good idea he said he'd like to put to me


[Verse]
       G
I said come on then, let's have it, there's a twinkle in his eye
        C                                              G
He says let me put it this way, have you ever wondered why
    C                                                    G
The rich have so much money when, if push should come to crunch
        D                                    G
You can only be in one room and only eat one lunch


[Verse]
  G
A cogent observation, but I didn't have the time
     C                                          G
I presumed this exposition must be leading to a crime
        C                                             G
He said wait a precious moment I am trying to set the scene
       D                                                   G
If you liberate your mind my friend you'll soon see what I mean


[Verse]
        Gm
He said have you ever wondered how a horse becomes a glue?
   Cm                                          Gm
Or how my uncle's pencil reached a garden in Peru?
    Cm                                            Gm
And have you tried valerian, the side-effects are strange
         G                              D              Gm
There is no such thing as accident, for everything's arranged


[Verse]
       G
I said listen friend your time inside has clearly flipped your mind
          C                                      G
These are merely hypotheticals I haven't got the time
        C                                              G
If it's blackmailing on Snapchat or a hold-up count on me
         D                                                  G
But this claptrap that you're spouting now just sounds like poetry


[Verse]
       Gm
Do not be so narrow-minded, my erstwhile accomplice trilled
         Cm                                          Gm
I've had lots of time for poetry it's left me rather thrilled
          Cm                                                 Gm
I've been reading the New York School: Frank O'Hara, Kenneth Koch
            G                             D              Gm
And they've given me more pleasure than a thousand dirty jokes


[Break]
G  G
C  G
C  G
D  G


[Verse]
          Gm
Well he's published by Macmillan now, he got a big advance
         Cm                                                Gm
Which he spent on buying a farmhouse in a pleasant part of France
    Cm                                         Gm
His first book won a Pulitzer, he's up for a Nobel
             G                                  D            Gm
They say you can't change human nature but he's doing rather well


[Outro]
G  G
C  G
C  G
D  G