C                          A7
I ran into my pastor at a gay bar
                          G
Let me tell you he looked so bizarre
                         C
In fishnets instead of a suit

[Verse 2]
                                A7
I ran into my dad's girlfriend named Pam
                       G
At a strip club with fives jammed
                          C
In every place you can imagine

[Chorus]
 G
All these things keep happening to me
      A
And every time it's all so confusing
F
I just want to be left alone
G
Please don't make me leave my home
 Am   G7    F     Dm  C
Small towns don't forgive

[Verse 3]
                            A7
I ran into my grandma at a sex store
                           G
I always thought she was such a bore
                           C
No wonder she's always so tired

[Verse 4]
                       A7
I ran into an old one night stand
                    G
Asked if I had any big plans
                               C
I'm whipping and gagging your mom

[Outro]
G
All these things keep happening to me
A
And every time it's all so confusing
F
I just want to be left alone
G7
Please don't make me leave my home
 Am   G7    F     Dm  C
Small towns don't forgive